Paddy McGinty an Irishman of note Fell into a fortune and bought himself a goat Said he, now on goat's milk it's time to have my fill And when he brought the nanny home he found it was a Bill. Now all of the ladies who live in Telilew Are all wearing bustles like their mothers used to do They each wear a bolster beneath their petticoat And leave the rest to providence and Paddy McGinty's Goat. Young Nora McCarthy the knot was going to tie Washed all her bloomers and hung them out to dry Along came the Goat and he saw the bits of white And chewed up all the patterns upon the wedding night Turn out the lights quick she shouted out to Pat Although I'm your wife I'm not worth looking at I had two of everything I told you when I wrote But now I'm wearing nothing left for Paddy McGinty's Goat Off the West coast of Ireland one morning there was seen As plain as any pipes on a German submarine The Coastguard Mahoney fell over in a fit And now said Paddy McGinty's Goat it's time for me to do my bit He jumped into the water as frisky as a whale Swam around the U-boat waggin' his little tail He upped with his horns and he stuck them in the boat And sent the Hun to Heligoland did Paddy McGinty's Goat Now old Mickey Reilly at the races yesterday Won a twenty pound note and shouted hip hooray He held out the note saying look at what I've got when along came Paddy McGinty's goat and swallowed all the lot He's eaten up me bank note cried Mickey with a jump They called for the doctor to get the stomach pump They pumped and they pumped for that twenty pound note But all they got was sixpence out of Paddy McGinty's goat Now this old goat of Pat's had a wondrous appetite One morning for breakfast he ate some dynamite A whole box of matches he swallowed all serene And then he goes and swallows up a quart of kerosene He sat by the fireside, didn't give a hang He swallowed a spark and exploded with a bang So if ever you go to heaven you can bet your bottom note That the angel with the whiskers on is Paddy McGinty's goat