As martin said to xanthe As they played with wooden toys You may have wendy's playhouse But where the heel's your boys? As paul said to fifi As they eyed each other up You may have better plimsoles But you can't pee standing up And I'd like to take the time to bite Their neck and make it bleed Or maybe I could cut holes in their Daddy's harris tweed And I can't put my finger on it Maybe it's something in their food And I cna't put my finger on it All I know is christ would've sued As sharon said to jamie As they sat down for a chat If you think I'm cooking dinner Well, prepare to eat dead rat As debbie said to alex As they held hands in the park How come you wear rupert check When you think you're so hard I should've done his land rover To let him know I'd been Instead I wrote f' off On the dirt across his screen And I can't put my finger on it Maybe it's something in their food And I cna't put my finger on it All I know is christ would've sued I wish I'd let them know that I was here A drop of arsenic in the wine Sulphuric acid in the beer