Cussin' Island

歌詞

Hello, kiddies No, it's not Mr. Rogers It's Jimmy, with a little tale Maybe you'll like this I know, I never should have written this song I know, I'm in trouble if your kids sing along I hope you don't misconstrue This could be my waterloo if you do And I know, the same thing could happen to you Cruisin' down the coast of Panama with my kids Snorkelin' with the stingrays, 'cudas and the squids Things were goin' way too well All of a sudden heaven turned into hell If you dare to venture out on the ocean It's unavoidable to face some commotion My kids were fightin' on the foredeck What the hell would Huck Finn do? Hey young lady did I just hear you call your brother a stupid little shit? You know you're not allowed to use those words Now apologize lickety split That's why I'm takin' you to Cussin' Island Headin' this boat south I think you should know That's where I met Cousteau And we will work on your potty mouth And when we get to Cussin' Island I'm gonna drop you on the beach Anchor way out, get ready for the bout And watch you exercise your freedom of speech At first they looked a little frightened and dismayed Just like those weird contestants on Naked and Afraid It started with a smirk then the dirty words came gushin' I saw dolphins swimmin' by, even they were blushin' I stood there on the bow feelin' like a hypocrite As they fired unholy salvos Like a German Messerschmitt And they cussed horseflies, homework, Taliban, and Barney Piano lessons, etiquette sessions, wakin' up too early Makin' beds, takin' meds, invasion of our space They kept it up until they both turned blue in the face World on our shoulders Feelin' like boulders We're tired, please give us a hand This is some weird shit Cussin' ain't worth it Let's bury those words in the sand Downwind, I could hear every word loud and clear Having second thoughts of bringin' them here It was just a split second decision Their repertoire was never envisioned Past time to put an exit plan into gear Time flies now all my little pirates are grown Soon they'll be raisin' buccaneers of their own Do I think they learned a lesson Or was it just a silly ass show Well the answer is part of the problem The simple truth, fuck no That's why we have to have Cussin' Island Our rally point and rendezvous I've sailed many a mile, collected millions of smiles And I know the same thing could happen to you That's right - it could happen to you And you know where it could happen Cussin' Island