AWA

The Bends

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  • 2005.09.20
  • 6:14
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The days are getting shorter shadows growing longer the temperature is falling his resolve is growing stronger he closes all the curtains shuts the windows tight throws an extra log into the fireplace tonight he falls asleep while reading books on scuba divers suffering from the bends in the morning goes to work a job he hates but he's learned to pretend The nights are getting longer the days are growing short again she had that dream about the child she aborted standing in a penthouse waiting for the elevator it opened, there he stood she was so afraid he'd hate her He wrapped his arms around her said 'you did not have a clue what you had done after all the years gone by who knew that you would be the lonely one' The longer that you live the less you want to hide but you keep on gazing straight ahead and keep most of it inside people who look at you assume you have conformed they judge you by your politics and by your uniform then one night you dream you're knocking on the cathedral door you want to confess to someone but you don't trust the clergy anymore The darkness is approaching the light is growing dim you swim the line of demarcation humming ancient hymns the more you see things clearly the less you understand and all of your ambition amounts to a grain of sand you hold your breath and close your eyes and wonder if the best is yet to be or have dreams morphed to nightmares rolling out into the angry sea Days are getting shorter night is growing longer the acorns are falling he brews his coffee stronger closes all the curtains locks the windows tight throws an extra log into the fireplace tonight

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Christine Lavin
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