Alright. Bitch! Funky muthafuckin' fresh Some of that '93 old school shit, hoe. Well I'm Too $hort baby, hear what I say I never do work but I always play 'Cause the game is life & I play the game So you never talk down on a player's name When I grab my mic I'm the one man crew Talkin' 'about me, wouldn't think about you When you heard Too $hort came to town You never would've thought I'd be lookin' down. On who? On you 'cause I'm so big Me & my money is all I dig I'm from the dangerous crew, we ain't no punk We take 24 tracks, drop the funk on your ass Beatin' like a dope fiend Back seat ridin' in a limosine Tellin' that freak all about me The creater of greater, sucker MC's Chillin' out in the oaktown singin' a rap No MC could rock like that Now I say it like bitches say No MC could rock my way When I rap it's always great Wouldn't care if it was like or on a tape It's me, $hort, the one & only Spittin' that rap to all my homies You know about you, you know I'm a star When I rap too good I might take it too far Had the whole damn crowd goin' wild 'Cause I don't stop rappin' that's my style Too $hort baby from east oakland I got more hoes than I can count on my hand. You got women? Well I got more. You don't know? Shit, I'm Playboy $hort They call me playboy $hort known everywhere Had a life long dream to be a player Way too cold at a younger age It was every day, just make that page Still playin' the same, still young at the game Never talk down on a player's name 'Cause I'm big time, paid all my dues I'm rich & famous & way too cool People can't fuck with the way I'm rhymin' They say it's too slow but it bought these diamonds Too $hort baby is the name I use A '93 lexus is what I cruise Clean from the start, I thought I was it I was cadillac slick in the dust I kick But the caddy got parked 'cause I'm ridin' new Eastside bitch, so I'm sidin' fool Money everywhere, all over the flow At the bank I'm known as Mr. $hort At the house I be chillin' gettin' some head Writin' raps all day, even in bed & them groupy ass bitches love this shit The funk rap master, made to fit Just her, I'm all in them guts Homeboy can't fuck so I hooked it up But young women like you with your big round asses Blind girls drivin' down the street called love Chasin' that man, who really can't stand Seein' your face so now you ran & you don't realize what you'll soon see The way makin' love is supposed to be With a player known as playboy too Rock a mic & a freak & you'll both be through Players play women who like to get played Bitched like you just tryin' to get laid But I like money & I get paid I do my duty & say good day I didn't want to make love, I'm not that fast What the hell, she's a freak, she even asked So let's go to my room, after the show Treat me like a pimp & pay me hoe You can suck my dick & I might sing Just love Too $hort, I'm everything So cool, my name is too Call it how you want but I won't call you Ring my phone & you might see Ringing my phone just won't get me 'Cause I'm hard to find & I get mine & if I was lookin' for you, I wouldn't be in line I'd be right on time in the right place Too $hort baby all in your face Talkin' 'about mine & what I want Fuckin' MC's with the dangerous funk I'm on my way, to the top So much rappin' I'll never stop & all that fame, you might claim Couldn't stand up by my rap name You might be good, I don't care I've been rappin' like this 13 long years I got more respect then you'll ever get 'Cause I don't stop rappin' & you know that shit Sucker MC's with your record deal Most tapes out now couldn't be real 'Cause your tracks ain't shit, dreamin' 'about hits But you'll find out Too $hort don't quit When I grab my mic I'm the one man crew Talkin' 'about me, wouldn't think about you When you heard Too $hort came to town You never would've thought I'd be lookin' down... [fades out]