Get Drunk With Dignity

歌詞

When you've had too much to drink there's certain things to keep in mind. Like when you find your hand and underarms are bleeding your beer bottle might not have a twist off cap and don't ever go home with a woman they call Moose or Vince And never bet that you can fit your head inside a glove compartment Get drunk with dignity Keep in mind that just because a bulldog licks your face its not necessary to lick him back Stay away from drinks with names like brain seizure or hippo laxative Get drunk with dignity If a bar has human ears nailed ot the walls don't pass out there and if your homemade jello has some goldfish in it you used the wrong bowl And there are phrases you must learn to avoid phrases like "that badge looks stupid" and "I can prove these shoes are fireproof" Get drunk with dignity try not to drool on bikers Don't moon a nun unless you got a real good reason dont get romantically involved with farm machinery Get drunk with dignity.