True Story

歌詞

Harmless historical nuts who wear boiler plate on their butts, who dress up in clothes from the 12th century to bash on each other with sticks and debris, and make up the world's largest private army. Harmless historical nuts. As I was out shopping, expecting no harm, two big FBI men grabbed me by the arm, dragged me into a cellar, shone lights in my eyes, demanding full answers, "without any lies" about a new threat to good patriotism, this "Society for Creative Anarchism." I said they're just Harmless historical nuts who wear boiler plate on their butts, who dress up in clothes from the 12th century to bash on each other with sticks and debris, and make up the world's largest private army. Harmless historical nuts. I answered, "'Tis true, to that club I belong, but pardon me gentlefolk, you've spelled the name wrong. Now I swear by the cross and the host and the prism, that last word is actually 'anachronism'. It just means outdated. Pray why don't you look in Sir Merriam-Webster's reliable book?" It says we're just Harmless historical nuts who wear boiler plate on our butts, who dress up in clothes from the 12th century to bash on each other with sticks and debris, and make up the world's largest private army. Harmless historical nuts. When finally persuaded to look up the word, they blushed and they winced, loud enough to be heard. They hastily sent me back out on the street, but I knew wasn't over and once more we'd meet, so I passed on the warning to realms far and near to give the impression for all the next year that we're just Harmless historical nuts who wear boiler plate on our butts, who dress up in clothes from the 12th century to bash on each other with sticks and debris, and make up the world's largest private army. Harmless historical nuts. And soon enough four infil-TRAITORS came in, snooping for politics, sniffing for sin. Three went away again, scratching their heads, but the fourth quit his job and turned stick jock instead. He's won coronets, he's in love with the sport, and we still have a copy of his last report. It says we're just Harmless historical nuts who wear boiler plate on our butts, who dress up in clothes from the 12th century to bash on each other with sticks and debris, and make up the world's largest private army. Harmless historical nuts. Harmless historical nuts.