The trouble with the world today it seems to me Is coffee in a cardboard cup The trouble with the affluent society Is coffee in a cardboard cup No one's ever casual and nonchalant No one wastes a minute in a restaurant No one wants a waitress passing pleasantries Like "Hiya miss" "Hiya sir" "May I take your order please" The trouble with the world today is plain to see Is everything is hurry up It's "rush it through" "Don't be slow" "BLT on rye to go" And coffee I think she said 'coffee' I know she said 'coffee In a cardboard cup' The trouble with the helter skelter life we lead Is coffee in a cardboard cup The trouble the psychologists have all agreed Is coffee in a cardboard cup Tell me what could possibly be drearier Than seaboard from the Belnord cafeteria Seems to me a gentleman would much prefer An "afternoon, how you been Would you like the special sir?" The trouble with the world today is plain to se Is everything is hurry up There's Reddi Whip Instant tea Minute rice and my oh me There's coffee I think she said 'coffee' I know she said 'coffee In a cardboard cup' The trouble with the world today beyond a doubt Is coffee in a cardboard cup The trouble is the way we like to take things out Like coffee in a cardboard cup No one knows the meaning of utopia Is dining at your coner cornucopia Seems to me we wouldn't be such nervous wrecks With 'hello there, be right back Would you care for separate checks' The trouble with the world today is plain to see Is everything is hurry up It's all become Looney Tunes With sugar packs and plastic spoons And coffee I think she said 'coffee' I know she said 'coffee' I'm sure she said 'coffee In a cardboard cup' (spoken): "Hurry up!"