Now, friends, if you'll listen to my troubles And bear with me all that you can For I'm an uncomfortable, horrible, terrible, unconsolable, unlucky man Was born in an unlucky climate That's why I'm so sad and so 'lone But what is the use of me trying, When I wish that I'd never been born? But now, Don't you make light of my troubles Bear with me all that you can For I'm an uncomfortable, horrible, terrible, unconsolable, unlucky man When I was about one and twenty I sought me a partner in trade And having the money a-plenty I married me a lovely old maid And when we got nicely to living Enjoying the pride of our life My partner stole all of my money And then ran away with my wife. But now, Don't you make light of my troubles Bear with me all that you can For I'm an uncomfortable, horrible, terrible, unconsolable, unlucky man I then started home to my Mama I never will leave her again But what is the use of me trying, When I'm such an unlucky man? And when I arrived at the cottage A-thinking the old folks in bed My Ma, she took me for a robber And broke the broom over my head. But now, Don't you make light of my troubles Bear with me all that you can For I'm an uncomfortable, horrible, terrible, unconsolable, unlucky man