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Would you like to buy me a brand new pair of pyjamas Would you like to fly with me on a holiday to Grenada Have V.I.P. treatment, a send off by brass band Special permission for us to land Would you like to venture round the Caribbean Island With more protection than anyone could have imagined We'll have a bullet-proof cossy, immaculate hair Plenty of joumalists to share Ho Ho Ho. . . Life is short Then you die. . . Ho Ho Ho Would you like to stay there pretending we're in heaven WouId you like a jailer to wake us up at eleven With freshly ground coffee, peaches and cream Living in someone else's dream lt's not right to take their money It's not right to taste the glory It's not right but it's so funny It's not right