The Unfortunate Man

歌詞

There once was a lawyer they called Mr. Clay; He had but few clients and they wouldn't pay. At last of starvation he grew so afraid That he courted and married a wealthy old maid. Chorus: He's a very unfortunate, a very unfortunate, A very unfortunate man. He's a very unfortunate, a very unfortunate, A very unfortunate man. She went to the washstand to bathe her fair face, Thus she destroyed all her beauty and grace. The rose on her cheek quickly grew very faint, And he saw on the towel 'twas nothing but paint. (Chorus) She went to the mirror to take down her hair; When she had done so, her scalp was all bare. Said she, "Don't be frightened to see my bald head; I'll put on my cap when I get into bed." (Chorus) She hung her false hair on the wall on a peg, Then she proceeded to take off a leg. Her trembling husband thought sure he would die When she asked him to come and take out her glass eye. (Chorus) The husband was biting his quivering lips While she was removing her counterfeit hips. Just then her false nose clattered down on the floor, And the poor lawyer screamed and run out at the door. (Chorus) Now all of you young men who would marry for life, Be sure to examine your intended wife. Remember the lawyer who trusted his eyes, And a little bit later got quite a surprise. (Chorus)