The whole world's going home with blue plastic bags Six bottles of Stella, Jacob's Creek and twenty fags And you know there is no shame Because we're all doing the same Staying in is the new going out No one's even coming round We'll have toyfights in the hall You're all going home with self-help books Hidden behind Heat because you're worried about the looks And you know there is no shame Because we're all doing the same Staring in is the new shouting out We're just trying to find out If there's any truth at all The whole world's listening to downbeat shite We over-did the good times Now we can't sleep at night And you know there is no shame Because we're all feeling the same Sing along with the sad songs Sing along sing along Sing along with the sad songs