Jerry was a race car driver He drove so goddamned fast He never did win no checkered flag But he never did come in last Jerry was a race car driver He'd say "El Sob number one" With a bocephus sticker on his 442 He'd light 'em up just for fun Ahhhh Ahhhh Captain Pierce was a fireman Richmond engine number three I'll be a wealthy man when I get a dime For all the things that man taught to me Captain Pierce was a strong man Strong as any man alive It stuck in his craw That they made him retire at the age of sixty five Ahhhh Ahhhh Go! Heh, heh, heh, heh Dog will hunt! Ahhhh Ahhhh Jerry was a race car driver Twenty two years old One too many crowbars one night And wrapped himself around a telephone pole