Act the fool, play the calf, and you'll always have the last laugh. Wear the cap and the bells and you'll rate all the great swells. If you become a doctor, folks'll face you with dread. If you become a dentist, they'll be glad when you're dead. You get a bigger hand if you can stand on your head. Be a clown, be a clown, be a clown. Be a clown, be a clown, all the world loves a clown. Be a crazy buffoon and the 'demoiselles 'll all swoon. Dress in huge baggy pants and you'll ride the road to romance. A butcher or a baker, ladies never embrace. A barber for a beau would be a social disgrace. They'll come to call if you can fall on your face. Be a clown, be a clown, be a clown. Be a clown, be a clown, all the world loves a clown. Be the poor silly ass and you'll always travel first class. Give 'em quips, give 'em fun and they'll pay to say you're A-one. If you become a farmer, you've the weather to buck. If become a gambler you'll be struck with your luck. But jack you'll never lack if you can quack like a duck. Be a clown, be a clown, be a clown.