Paranoia is the insect worming its way Through my subconscious thoughts It's the larva of my self doubt Gestating in my heart as I spiral down And everything I touch is breaking And it falls to earth in splinters And I shiver as every splinter Finds its way underneath my skin And after 22 years I can still make my skin crawl Every shortcoming, a pitfall On my way to making amends Within myself to be what I became Sometimes it feels like the whole wide world Has made itself my enemy But I will stand upon my own two feet And raise my head up I lick my wounds Trying to cleanse the infection Rabid and diseased reality fades away When I pushed myself too far A dream of emotional perfection Has left a wounded heart Trying to perceive the gifts inherent inside me It's like squeezing the trigger It's like opening fire On everyone who's let me down On every beautiful lie that is only fiction For the first time I'm losing control and I like it Freedom feels like the noose is gone