Animal Trainer

歌詞

I’m an animal trainer A circus entertainer I’ve trained animals by the score Lions, tigers and wild boar. I’ve made and lost a fortune In my wild career. Some say the cause was women And some say it was beer. Then I went through bankruptcy And lost my whole menagerie But I did not despair. I got a bright idea. While searching through my underwear A thought occurred to me I’m tired of training elephants So why not train a flea? Why should I hunt for animals And through the jungle roam When there’s local talent To be found right here at home? I found one but I won’t say where And educated him with care. And taught him all the facts of life And then he found himself a wife. I give them board and lodgings free And every night they dine off me They don’t eat caviar or cake But they enjoy a good rump steak Off my anatomy Off my anatomy It is an odd sensation When after meals they take a stroll Around the old plantation. Now I’m as happy as can be I’ve bought them lots of tricks you see And now they’re both supporting me They’re both supporting me. Walk up, walk up I’m the greatest show on earth Walk up, walk up And get your money’s worth See Phyllis and Henry Those educated fleas Cavorting and sporting On the flying trapeze So any time you itch Don’t scratch or make a fuss You never can tell you might destroy Some budding genius.