Good evening, ladies and gentlemen, and I'm here to tell you story tonight It's a story right inside my heart and I'm just gonna have to testify! She was a teenage virgin waitress From Fort Smith, Arkansas She's a queen of the cowabunga Loves Razorback football She like to bite me, give me the rabies When I'm away from her I feel crazy She's my rabies baby Drives me crazy She's my rabies baby She got the round mounds Of pure pleasure pounds Come from way down south Sometimes she's foamin' at the mouth I said, "Oh honey, what can this be?" She combed her beard and said, "Lycanthropy" She's my rabies baby Drives me crazy She's my rabies baby Rabies baby My rabies baby Oh, my rabies baby She's my rabies baby