When I was yea high, till I was three I suffered from petit mal epilepsy Any excitement gave me a fit But there were drugs to cure me of it Weird diseases! I get weird diseases Whenver Krishna sneezes, I get weird diseases So at the least sign of emotion I got a tranquilizing potion Thus, from the time I was a young boy I could feel neither anger nor joy Just weird diseases, random weird diseases Once, from eating recalled cheeses, I got weird diseases Nearly fatal renal cysts; maybe Aspergers, if that exists Pityriasis rosea; two separate times, giardia Weird diseases! I get weird diseases Wafting on the toxic breezes, I get weird diseases Debilitating spider bites; hiccups for three days and nights A thousand earaches, one deformed eardrum Hyperacusis... What's that from? It's from weird diseases. I get weird diseases Whenever Baby Jesus pleases, he gives me weird diseases Chronic fatigue; COPD; petit mal epilepsy To big holes inside my brain Migraine aura, sans migraine Weird diseases! I get weird diseases Weird diseases Weird diseases Weird diseases I get weird diseases Weird diseases