I met this girl on Myspace She was 16 and a half She said that I was well buff And that I made her laugh So I sent her a picture Of me wanking in the bath I think I misjudged the situation She didn't want to see my soapy masturbation Please don't grass me up to 'tom! There's a lot of perverts on the internet Trying to chat up girls and get their ding-dongs wet I am one but don't tell my Mum 'Cause if she finds out then I'm gonna get done LITTLE MISS KUNT: There's a lot of perverts on the internet Trying to chat up girls and get our ding-dongs wet He is one but don't tell his Mum 'Cause if she finds out then he's gonna get done Then there was this lady I met on Yahoo! chat We were getting on like a house on fire Then everything went flat When I asked to see a picture Of her fingering her twat I think I misjudged the situation She grassed me up to the bod in charge of moderation And now my user account is blocked There's a lot of perverts on the internet Trying to chat up girls and get their front bums wet I am one but don't tell my Mum 'Cause if she finds out then I'm gonna get done LITTLE MISS KUNT: There's a lot of perverts on the internet Trying to chat up girls and get our front bums wet He is one but don't tell his Mum 'Cause if she finds out then he's gonna get done I found this girl on Facebook With whom I used to go to school I left a little message for her Up there on her wall Of how I often think of her Whilst playing with my tool I think I misjudged the situation She told her husband about my masturbation And now he wants to kick me in the pods